The Ramadan Series: Iftaar Extravagance

Dear sisters,

Assalamoalaikum

mmmmmm... iftaar! Just the thought of it makes our taste buds tiiiing! Pakoray, dahi barray (or dahi bally as some people call it), cholay (or channay as some people call it... gaaahhh, so many variations!), fruit chaat, and rooh-e-afzah are definitely the top 5 goodies we crave during Ramadan.

There's nothing like a good iftaar to bring together swarms of uncles, aunties, and bachay of all shapes and sizes. But you've gotta be careful! Not about aunties fighting over the last khajoor, uncles wrestling to get as much fruit chaat as possible, or kids double dipping in the chutni and wiping their hands on your dupatta... But about something else:

As we get closer and closer to iftaar time, we (women of the house) get busier and busier trying to get the iftaari ready! It's almost like working in a restaurant, on a tight schedule, to please the customers (the men of the house, picky bachay, and sometimes even in-laws who love coming unannounced to eat bhabhi ke haath ka khaana!). Even when it's time to break our fast, it's not uncommon to find someone (usually ammas) stuck in the kitchen trying to fry that last batch of pakoras, making sure everything is just right.

Why does our culture enforce so much extravagance when it comes to food? I'm sure the world won't end if we break our fast with dates, water, and maybe TWO other items... But no, "Phir Ramadan ka maza kaisay aaey ga bhai? Jub tak hum 6- 10 dishes nahin thoos letay, humara dil nai bharta! Aaakhir taraweeh parhne ke liyay bhi tou energy chahiyay na?... Aur raat ke khaanay tak tou pait waisay bhi khali hojata hai". Those are not my words, people actually say these things. Like seriously, stomach hai ya black hole! Even that would fill up at some point.

The Prophet (saw) said: "The son of Adam does not fill any vessel worse than his stomach; for the son of Adam a few mouthfuls are sufficient to keep his back straight. If you must fill it, then one-third for food, one-third for drink and one-third for air." (Tirmidhi, Ibn Maajah. saheeh by al-Albaani).

On the surface, nothing may seem wrong with making many things for iftaar but we need to realize that in doing so, we lose that valuable time of making dua right before breaking our fast. We can't exactly make sincere dua while multitasking in the kitchen at the very last minute. This is why it's important to try and finish making the iftaar at least 10 minutes before maghrib... so we can spend that time making sincere dua.

The Messenger of Allah (saw) said: "Three supplications will not be rejected (by Allah (swt)), the supplication of the parent for his child, the supplication of the one who is fasting, and the supplication of the traveler. [al-Bayhaqi, at-Tirmidhi - Sahih]

No doubt there is blessing in iftaar and suhur, but blessing doesn't come from the number of dishes on the table. Let us try to remember that too much of anything is not recommended in Islam. I'm not asking you to stop making yummy things for iftaar, but rather to lessen the amount of cooking involved and to invest the time saved in making sincere dua. Amidst of all the luxury, we tend to forget about those who don't even have clean water to break their fast... let us all try and shed the extravagance to better see, understand, and appreciate the blessings of Allah (swt).

"...and eat and drink but waste not by extravagance, certainly He (Allah) likes not Al-Musrifoon (those who waste by extravagance)" [Surah Al-A'raaf :31]

A simple lifestyle is the sunnah of our Prophet (saw) and that's what we should be opting for inshallah.

Sincerely,
D.M.