Assalamoalaikum
With the sight of a hawk, speed of a cheetah, and cleverness of a fox, kwanri larkian and larkay don't stand a chance against the rishta lady. I'm sure you know of at least one aunty who is always talking about shaadi. She's always trying to convince other aunties to get their kids married.
Rishta Lady: Kya umar hogi tumhari beti ki?
Innocent mom: Jee bus eighteen ki hogi es saal inshallah.
Rista Lady: KYA? athara saal ki hogaey kuri aur abhi tak rishtay dekhnay shuru nai kiyay! Kya larki ko ghar bethao gi saari umar!? Tauba tauba *touches ears* kya zamana aa gaya hai!
Innocent mom: Nai wo... apni parhaie complete...
Rishta Lady: Larkion ki shaadi jaldi kardeni chahiyay, uddjusst karnay mein aasani hoti hai... aik baar umar pakki hojaey na, phir wo kissi ki nai suntien... main aik achay larkay ki family ko jaanti hoon, tum kaho tou baat chalaoon? Buntyyyyy betaaa mera cell phone tou lana bhag ke! Abhi call karti hoon unhain!
Innocent mom: Lekin wo... sunnain tou...
Rishta Lady: Dekho ab tum na shukri kar rahi ho! Astaghfirullah! Larka achay khandaan se hai, barray ameer log hain, tumhari beti tou raaj karegi RAAJ! main tumhari jaga hoti tou phut se haan kardeti! array larka DOCTOR hai *drools*, ameer hai, bungla gaari sub kuch hai, gora chita hai... aur kya chahiyay?
Innocent mom: Wo sub to theek hai magar...
Rishta Lady: Tumhari beti tou Eshoriya [she means, Aishwarya] Rai jaisi lagti hai... ghar ke kaam tou kar leti hai na? safaie aur khana pakkana waghaira? Bhai mainay tou apni beti ki etni achi training ki thi ke uske susral walay aaj tak "wah wah" karte hain *grins with pride*... parh likh ke kya karna hai? shaadi ke baad tou yahi kaam karne hote hain. Main tou kehti hoon college ko choro, kissi silaie karhaie ki class mein admission kara do. Yahan ke school ke mohol se tou Allah bachaey... tauba, humari bachi ghar mein he achi! ye lo, Bunty phone le aya... Bismillah karo! *dials*
Judging from their conversation, most of the desi population suffers from dunya obsession (commonly known as materialism)... especially when it comes to finding the "right" spouse. Let's read the rishta lady's notes on what she thinks makes the perfect husband and the perfect wife.
The Perfect Wife:
- Must know how to cook well enough to please and feed her husband (aakhir husband ke dil ka raasta pait se guzarta hai!) AND susral walay
- Must know how to sew (in case the saas wants an urgent outfit for her upcoming kitty par-tae!)
- Must be respectful and zulm sehnay wali type... after all, larki ke patience se he tou ghar chalta hai!
- Must bring dowry (more is less)
- Must be in late teens or early twenties
- Must be willing and happy to live with her in-laws
- Must spend most of her married life in the place where she truly belongs, the kitchen
- Must not use her brain cells too much
The Perfect Husband:
- Must have a never ending supply of money (pot of gold, sonay ki chirya/murghie, and unlimited credit are all accepted)
- Must own a big house and several cars
- Must be a doctor or an engineer
- Must complete his degree and masters and find a job before shaadi
- Must be in late 20s or early 30s (only fully settled guys wanted!)
- Must be romantic as per the Bollywood standard (includes falling in love at first sight and going in a trance *with background music*, singing and running in the farms hand in hand with his wife, beating the gunday budmaash, and living happily ever after)
um... yea, shocking. As crazy as it sounds, these are things people actually look for in a "suitable" rishta... and then we wonder why the divorce rate is increasing (pfft, what a surprise -___-). A marriage based only on these standards is bound to collapse... because it has no strong foundation of deen. With the husband busy making money and the wife busy in cooking, cleaning, taking care of kids, etc. religion gets pushed even further down the priority list. In doing so, the marriage might still work... but would the couple ever feel true peace, happiness, and love? Of course not. The hustle bustle of life keeps us so busy that we've started acting more like robots and less like humans (this is why those butterflies in the stomach fly away after the first few years of marriage). Somewhere along the way, we've lost our connection with Allah (swt) and once that is lost, so is the connection with His creation. Remember, Islam is our guide to life that Allah (swt) blessed us with. As Muslims we are taught to juggle deen and dunya together and with the perfect blend of both, true happiness and salvation can be achieved.
Our Prophet Muhammad (saw) taught us to look for a righteous person when it comes to marriage. If the person's faith and character is in check, the rest automatically falls in place. After all, the success of a marriage isn't determined by young age, degree, high paying job, good looks, and huge property and bank balance. We can all think of at least one couple who has all of those things... but their marriage still seems to be falling apart. On the contrary, a couple with none of those things can still lead a happy and peaceful life if they are close to Allah (swt) and practice Islam wholeheartedly.
Prophet (saw) said: "A woman may be married for four reasons: for her property, for her rank, for her beauty, and for her religion (and character), so marry the one who is best in the religion and prosper." (Bukhari and Muslim)This is a reminder for all of us, who are at or are reaching the age of marriage, to shun the hollow standards and look for someone who is a good Muslim... everything else (including education, job, looks) comes later. I'm not asking you to completely ignore all other factors, but rather to make faith and character your PRIORITY and THEN consider other things inshallah.
Sincerely,
D.M.
Hilarious and so true (and sad!). LOL @ must not use brain cells. Gahhh!
ReplyDeleteI completely agree that a person's faith should be the number one thing to consider and although we want to make that attempt, materialistic things end up influencing us when making the decision. Stupid shaitan!